


Superstition, Halloween, and Yessirski Chat, Yessirski

by tillyenna



Series: 15-16 Draft GC [25]
Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Crack, No Fourth Wall, chat fic, dumb hockey boys being dumb, referencing real life events
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:47:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27332893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tillyenna/pseuds/tillyenna
Summary: Featured in this episode:Nate Dogg's twitch streams (two gs people, two gs)Arizona Yotes management/higher ups being complete aholesHalloween costumesSegsy prepping for surgeryBrief mentions of bobby orr
Relationships: Auston Matthews/Frederik Andersen, Claude Giroux/Danny Briere, Connor McDavid/Leon Draisaitl, Dylan Strome/Alex DeBrincat, Eddie Lack/Robert Luongo, Jeff Carter/Mike Richards, Matthew Tkachuk/Everyone, Michael Latta/Tom Wilson, Patrick Kane/Jonathan Toews, Relationships: Sidney Crosby/Nathan Mackinnon, Travis Konecny/Nolan Patrick, cale makar/carter hart
Series: 15-16 Draft GC [25]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1776370
Comments: 18
Kudos: 128





	Superstition, Halloween, and Yessirski Chat, Yessirski

EJ:

| 

@Dogg  
  
---|---  
  
EJ:

| 

DID YOU JUST SAY ON A TWITCH THAT SID FINDS LANDY HOT????  
  
Sid:

| 

I’m sorry  
  
Sid:

| 

Does anyone NOT find Landy hot?  
  
Cale:

| 

We’ve been over this. Yes. Me.  
  
Sid:

| 

But Nate, did you really?  
  
Nate:

| 

Erm no?  
  
EJ:

| 

YES YOU DID  
  
Josty:

| 

I’m assuming this is because someone asked about your “girlfriend”  
  
Josty:

| 

And whether “she” would have a problem with you saying landy is a rocket  
  
Nate:

| 

Landy IS a rocket  
  
Sid:

| 

I’m really NOT his girlfriend  
  
EJ:

| 

:D :D :D  
  
EJ:

| 

Then who was he talking about?  
  
TBear:

| 

🙋‍♂️  
  
EJ:

| 

😂😂😂  
  
Sid:

| 

I mean… I’d have said Tys too 😂😂😂  
  
Josty:

| 

Also, is EJ REALLY the best Av?  
  
Nate:

| 

Facts bro, can’t argue with thaaaat  
  
EJ:

| 

I’m SO the best Av  
  
Hartsy:

| 

Disagree  
  
Hartsy:

| 

:D  
  
EJ:

| 

Stop being cute on the gc or I’ll fine you  
  
Claude:

| 

I thought we established you can’t fine him  
  
EJ:

| 

I’ll find a way ok?  
  
Sid:

| 

I’m also alarmed how many of you are watching Nate’s twitch  
  
Sid:

| 

DO YOU NOT GET ENOUGH NATE CONTENT IN THE SEASON?  
  
EJ:

| 

Never enough Nate content  
  
Cale:

| 

Also, I noticed you agreed with the chat that Landy is YOUR dad  
  
Cale:

| 

Which, stop stealing my parents bro  
  
EJ:

| 

😂😂😂  
  
EJ:

| 

JUICE GOES BRO AT THE BRO. I LOVE IT  
  
Chucky:

| 

I refuse to watch it  
  
Chucky:

| 

But I do see the gifs of you being weird AF the next day on tumblr  
  
Nate:

| 

People gif me?  
  
Chucky:

| 

People gif you  
  
Chucky:

| 

Pretty sure yessirski is gonna be a meme  
  
Josty:

| 

I mean, our MEDIA team yessirski’d so  
  
Hartsy:

| 

And all of tumblr being all “HE SAID SIR, THAT MEANS HE’S A SUB”  
  
Hartsy:

| 

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂  
  
Nate:

| 

What even bro?  
  
Hartsy:

| 

I’ll tell you when you’re older 😉  
  
Nate:

| 

YOU ARE YOUNGER THAN ME HARTSY  
  
EJ:

| 

I’m concerned that YOU know what that word means Cahtah  
  
Hartsy:

| 

😇  
  
Hartsy:

| 

Only from fic, obviously. I would never ever defile your baby EJ.  
  
Hartsy:

| 

Never.  
  
EJ:

| 

@Claude why is your goalie such a little shit  
  
Claude:

| 

He’s awesome. Shut up  
  
Chucky:

| 

Also did you know someone took the audio of you calling yourself a god on fortnite and put it over footage of you on the ice  
  
Chucky:

| 

Which fyi makes you look VERY up your own ass  
  
Matts:

| 

Ah, shit I’ve not been around but  
  
Matts:

| 

@chucky CONGRATS TO BABY T  
  
Chucky:

| 

Dude. She was ON FIRE  
  
Chucky:

| 

On. FIRE.  
  
Marns:

| 

Oh yeah, it was her field hockey thing no?  
  
Chucky:

| 

Third time state champ 😉  
  
Chucky:

| 

That’s MY baby sister :D  
  
Josty:

| 

Isn’t she technically an adult now?  
  
Chucky:

| 

#nope  
  
Chucky:

| 

Whatever you are thinking  
  
Chucky:

| 

The answer is hell no  
  
Josty:

| 

NOT LIKE THAT  
  
Josty:

| 

I meant like, not junior state champs  
  
Chucky:

| 

Eh, she’s been playing up for a while  
  
Chucky:

| 

We’re not fucking lying when we say she’s the best athlete in our family  
  
Stromer:

| 

Speaking of juniors… Kirby’s off to play for worlds  
  
Brinks:

| 

#soproud  
  
Brinks:

| 

Anyone else’s babies going?  
  
Teeks:

| 

Mine and Patty’s new baby is going :D  
  
Teeks:

| 

#teamprouddad  
  
Josty:

| 

I think we have prospects going  
  
Stromer:

| 

Dachy is the only NHL player on team canada  
  
EJ:

| 

WAIT JOSTY I HAVE JUST SEEN YOUR INSTA  
  
EJ:

| 

DID YOU GO AS ME FOR HALLOWEEN?????  
  
Josty:

| 

😂😂😂  
  
Josty:

| 

I clearly did not  
  
Josty:

| 

I look infinitely hotter that you did  
  
EJ:

| 

Lies  
  
EJ:

| 

Also I hope the pair of you were in crop tops  
  
Stromer:

| 

Are you and fabbro a thing?  
  
Josty:

| 

Nooooooo  
  
Josty:

| 

No  
  
Josty:

| 

He’s my buddy  
  
Lack:

| 

It’s noooooooooovember  
  
Lack:

| 

You know what THAT MEANS  
  
Lack:

| 

🎅🎅🎅🎅🎅  
  
Lu:

| 

My guess was gonna be terrible moustaches  
  
Sid:

| 

No  
  
Sid:

| 

Eddie, Christmas is for December  
  
Lack:

| 

JINGLE BELLS, SIDNEY SMELLS  
  
Claude:

| 

😂😂😂😂😂  
  
Hartsy:

| 

Noooooo I’m still enjoying Halloween fics  
  
Hartsy:

| 

That means it isn’t Christmas yet  
  
EJ:

| 

I’m gonna write you and juice an adorable little Christmas fic  
  
Hartsy:

| 

You really don’t have to 😂  
  
EJ:

| 

#rude calejuice, keep your boy in line  
  
Cale:

| 

I DON’T CONTROL HIM  
  
Cale:

| 

🤠🤠🤠  
  
Hartsy:

| 

🤠😂❤  
  
Kaner:

| 

Why is nobody bringing up the fact that not only did brinksy dress up as a high schooler, but also HE LOOKS LIKE A HIGH SCHOOLER  
  
Stromer:

| 

So fucking much  
  
Matts:

| 

??  
  
Brinks:

| 

I dressed as a wildcat, it’s a pun  
  
Staalsy:

| 

The high school musical one? Or the brit hockey team one?  
  
Brinks:

| 

What??  
  
Brinks:

| 

HSM  
  
Brinks:

| 

Obviously  
  
Teeks:

| 

They have hockey in england?!?!?  
  
Stromer:

| 

They have hockey everywhere  
  
Staalsy:

| 

Yeah, my bro used to play in the UK  
  
Staalsy:

| 

So like, I followed him while he was there, and picked up some of the teams  
  
Tazer:

| 

Wait, you literally dressed up as a high schooler brinks?  
  
Brinks:

| 

I DRESSED UP AS SOMEONE FROM A MOVIE  
  
Kaner:

| 

Someone from a movie about high school  
  
Brinks:

| 

I hate you all  
  
Josty:

| 

@hawks, have you guys all disowned bobby orr?  
  
Hartsy:

| 

Burn your idols  
  
Richy:

| 

Was that a…. superstition reference?  
  
Hartsy:

| 

*dies*  
  
Hartsy:

| 

Yes it was  
  
Hartsy:

| 

I’m lost for words  
  
Richy:

| 

🤷‍♂️ I have a lot of time on my hands.  
  
Richy:

| 

And it’s not fanfic  
  
Richy:

| 

Like, I don’t like the concept of reading about real life people that I know  
  
Richy:

| 

But m/m hockey romance is definitely a thing  
  
Hartsy:

| 

Send me links of good stuff though!  
  
Tazer:

| 

@Josty, you act like we didn’t disown him YEARS ago  
  
Teeks:

| 

What’s he being disowned for  
  
Tazer:

| 

Trump supporting  
  
Teeks:

| 

I legit don’t get American politics  
  
Claude:

| 

TK!  
  
Claude:

| 

WE WORK IN AMERICA  
  
Claude:

| 

YOU LIVE IN AMERICA LIKE MOST OF THE TIME  
  
Teeks:

| 

I mean… I don’t really get Canadian politics either  
  
Claude:

| 

#disowned  
  
Cartsy:

| 

Can’t disown your penance G  
  
Hartsy:

| 

That reminds me  
  
Hartsy:

| 

Because I stumbled across a broiux primer  
  
Hartsy:

| 

That then implied that Danny has a ginger rookies fetish  
  
Hartsy:

| 

@Danny, did you actually also sleep with couts?  
  
Danny:

| 

NO  
  
Danny:

| 

Jeez, I got enough of this at the time  
  
Claude:

| 

I moved out because Danny said he wouldn’t date me while we were living together  
  
Claude:

| 

#sodull  
  
Danny:

| 

SENSIBLE CLO  
  
Danny:

| 

SENSIBLE  
  
Teeks:

| 

I mean, that is legit why Patty is living with Haysie  
  
Teeks:

| 

Living with someone at the start of a relationship is like the worst plan  
  
Willy:

| 

Disagree  
  
Willy:

| 

It’s the fucking bomb  
  
Latts:

| 

😍  
  
Danny:

| 

Regardless, Couts was literally just my rookie  
  
Claude:

| 

Unlike me 😉  
  
Danny:

| 

Don’t make me regret that  
  
Claude:

| 

Impossible. You love me :D  
  
Cartsy:

| 

@Danny I like the way your rookie is in his thirties and captain of a team and he’s STILL a little shit  
  
Claude:

| 

You guys wouldn’t have me any other way  
  
Richy:

| 

Pretty sure Danny would have you EVERY way 😉  
  
Hartsy:

| 

Pretty sure we don’t want to hear about G’s sex life any more than he wants to hear about ours  
  
Teeks:

| 

IDK… this is chirping GOLD  
  
Sid:

| 

Can we talk yotes for a second  
  
Stromer:

| 

Can we really fucking not  
  
Sid:

| 

I mean, management seem to suck balls  
  
Sid:

| 

My question is is there anyone down there that we worry about  
  
Stromer:

| 

I mean, obviously I have ex-teammates down there  
  
Stromer:

| 

Latts and I both do  
  
Segsy:

| 

Daddy’s down there  
  
Teeks:

| 

As is Laws  
  
Nate:

| 

I think Sid’s point  
  
Nate:

| 

Given that management have no problem with racists  
  
Nate:

| 

It’s not that much of a stretch to think that they don’t have a problem with homophobes  
  
| 

Stromer has left the chat  
  
Nate:

| 

??? What did I say  
  
Brinks:

| 

You honestly think Dylan was just having a picnic down in AZ  
  
Latts:

| 

You honestly think ANY OF US WERE?  
  
Latts:

| 

It wasn’t as bad in Tuscan as it was up in Phoenix  
  
Latts:

| 

But jesus, the idea that Az management are complete aholes  
  
Latts:

| 

ISN’T FUCKING NEWS  
  
Willy:

| 

Babes  
  
Willy:

| 

Ilu  
  
Sid:

| 

We knew this?  
  
Sid:

| 

Why aren’t we doing something about this???  
  
Howdy:

| 

Because there’s no way to do something about it without coming out  
  
Howdy:

| 

There’s plenty of teams around the league that aren’t a picnic to play in if you’re queer  
  
Howdy:

| 

But without putting our own necks on the line  
  
Howdy:

| 

How the fuck are we supposed to do anything about it  
  
Sid:

| 

Then we work out a way we can  
  
| 

Davo has added Stromer to the chat  
  
Davo:

| 

Stay Dyl  
  
Stromer:

| 

Convince me  
  
Davo:

| 

Stay so we can chirp chucky about wearing a matching sweater vest with Brady?  
  
Chucky:

| 

OUR COSTUME WAS ON POINT  
  
Chucky:

| 

We looked SO ACCURATE  
  
Davo:

| 

It was the hair that helped  
  
Chucky:

| 

Why do you think we picked it??  
  
Marns:

| 

What I want to know  
  
Marns:

| 

Is how do you and brady look so similar  
  
Marns:

| 

AND YET BRADY ISN’T HOT?  
  
Chucky:

| 

😂😂😂  
  
Chucky:

| 

Legit just told him you said that  
  
Marns:

| 

I’m ok with Brades knowing I don’t think he’s hot  
  
Marns:

| 

You definitely got the pretty genes  
  
Staalsy:

| 

#teamprettybrother :D  
  
JT:

| 

Eric KNOWS he’s the prettiest staal  
  
Richy:

| 

Question is  
  
Richy:

| 

DOES SKINNER KNOW THIS?  
  
Staalsy:

| 

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh  
  
Staalsy:

| 

It’s not, ugh. No-one is pretty stood next to jeff ok?  
  
Richy:

| 

Tell. Him.  
  
Staalsy:

| 

I can’t. He’s too beautiful.  
  
Segsy:

| 

Stop being mean to staalsy richy  
  
Staalsy:

| 

:O you live???  
  
Segsy:

| 

Yeah yeah. Just getting settled in for my 2 week quarantine in NYC  
  
Segsy:

| 

☹  
  
Kaner:

| 

Then surgery time?  
  
Segsy:

| 

Then surgery time.  
  
Segsy:

| 

And I expect you all to entertain me while I’m recovering  
  
Segsy:

| 

And by entertain me, I mean make terrible choices and tell me all about them  
  
Segsy:

| 

And/Or send me pics of my boy TBear  
  
TBear:

| 

Of course  
  
TBear:

| 

I’ve been saving them so I can spam you when you get out  
  
Segsy:

| 

He hasn’t even sent me a good luck message yet  
  
Segsy:

| 

BUT DON’T REMIND HIM  
  
Segsy:

| 

Because if he sends one I want it to have actually come from him. Y’know?  
  
TBear:

| 

☹  
  
Kaner:

| 

We’ll be here regardless  
  
Kaner:

| 

And we’ll keep you entertained  
  
Kaner:

| 

I’ll make Jonny do stupid dances and film them for you  
  
Tazer:

| 

He won’t.  
  
Teeks:

| 

Patty says he also deserves vids of JT dancing like a twat  
  
Tazer:

| 

Patty isn’t getting shit.  
  
Tazer:

| 

Stromer can you please sign a damn contract  
  
Stromer:

| 

I will Cap! I will.  
  
Davo:

| 

You calling him cap makes me feel very uncomfortable  
  
Brinks:

| 

😂  
  
Brinks:

| 

Seabs starting fining us after Dyl and I called each other cap in the locker room  
  
Stromer:

| 

C swapping :D  
  
Stromer:

| 

❤  
  
**Author's Note:**

> Burn. Your. Idols.  
> BURN THEM.


End file.
